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Humor Times blog - by James Israel

I publish a monthly paper called the Humor Times, available via subscription anywhere in the world. This blog allows me to comment in a more timely manner on current events, etc., since, after all, I have plenty to say!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Fox News is Lying to You -- AGAIN

Fox News reported that a video of Dept. of Agriculture employee Shirley Sherrod talking to an audience of NAACP members proved she was racist, and shows her saying that she was proud of withholding help for a white couple who were in danger of losing their farm.

Only one problem: When you view the whole tape, you see that this is not so.

Ms Sherrod was relating doubts she had way back in 1986, when she was working for a non-profit. She was explaining how for a while in her position there, only black clients had come through needing help. Then one day, she had her very first opportunity to help a white couple. As she explained after this controversy broke out, she was at the time "telling the story of how working with [the white client] helped me to see the issue is not about race. It's about those who have versus those who do not have."

She related how she had joined this non-profit to help other blacks, since that was all she had seen suffering growing up. So when a rare white couple in this area applied for help, she was, at this early point in her career twenty-four years ago, taken aback, and she admits, tempted to see them as not worthy of help somehow. But the whole point of the story she’s relating, as you see if you watch her whole talk, is that she saw the light, and realized it was poor people in general she wanted to help.

And another small detail left out by the makers of this video, conservative activist Andrew Breitbart, and Fox “News” is that the white couple in question -- you know, the “victims” of Sherrod’s “racism”? -- absolutely love her. When questioned on this story, the old couple were incredulous that anyone could call her racist, and talked about how great she was with them, and how she helped save their farm.

The farmer's wife, Eloise Spooner, 82, told The Atlanta Journal-Constitution on Tuesday that Sherrod helped save their land. Spooner, who considered Sherrod a "friend for life," said that "the federal official worked tirelessly to help" the couple hold onto their farm as they faced bankruptcy in 1986. "Her husband told her, ‘You're spending more time with the Spooners than you are with me,'" Spooner said. "She took probably two or three trips with us to Albany just to help us out."

Some racist.

Look, we all experience doubts in life, and adjust our viewpoints as we mature. Shirley Sherrod was courageous enough to talk openly about her doubts, to make a point that she knows she was wrong to think that way, and that she realized it is better to unite with all races to fight the injustice of poverty.

And this is the type of person Fox News wants to smear? What are they really doing here? Just stoking racial resentment in whites?

No? Are you sure? After all, there’s a pattern here. There was the episode in September 2009 with White House Adviser Van Jones being forced to resign after it was revealed that he said some bad things about Republicans before joining the administration, basically. And what about the ACORN video circus, brought to you by the same folks who brought you this latest “creatively edited” tape?

That one was also proven to be surreptitiously edited with nefarious intent, for once again, when you view the unedited tape, you find that you are being deceived. In the ACORN case, tapes were edited to make it seem employees were helping a pimp and his whore with plans for housing underage prostitutes from Mexico. Just one problem: This too, was a big lie.

One of the employees these slimeballs were trying to frame turned out to be a guy who was actually eliciting as much information as he could from them. After all, he believed that they were criminal sex slave traders -- he bought their act -- and he wanted to report them to the police. Which he did -- immediately after these soulless “pranksters” left with their secret video “evidence.”

Which “evidence,” as you may recall, was dutifully reported by Fox News. And reported. And reported. It was all they talked about for days. Playing the clips over and over again. The heavily edited clips. The intentionally misleading, slanderous clips. Reported as news. By Fox “News.”

Now the latest is that Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack said his department will reconsider the ouster of Shirley Sherrod. He decided this after civil rights leaders told him they were "snookered" into believing a conservative website's charges of racism against her were true, which was what had caused them to make an earlier, rushed statement that she should resign.

So, conservatives, I ask you: Is this really “fair and balanced” reporting? Is this the “trusted news source” you want to get your information from?

Because, if it is, you must really like being lied to.

And we ain’t talkin’ no “white” lies here, either.

Yes, by now the truth is plain. It is, shall we say, black and white.

* * * * * * * * *

Check out Rachel Maddow’s brilliant dissection of this story, as well as her brilliant dissection of the Obama administration’s terrible habit of kowtowing to right wing media on these character assassination attempts, before thoroughly investigating the charges. The administration is, as she puts it, “feeding the dog at the table -- and the dog is going to keep coming back.”

News report on the Shirley Sherrod story.

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Friday, July 02, 2010

Tired of the stupid "Which Side of the Fence" emails from right-wingers?

Ok, how many of you have gotten emails like this? I finally got fed up, and rewrote it, correcting all the mistakes. Read the right-wing version shown first here, then scroll down and read the other...


Which side of the fence?
If you ever wondered which side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!

If a Conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
If a Liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a Conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
If a Liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

If a Conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a Liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a Conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A Liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a Conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels.
A Liberal will demand that those they don't like be shut down.

If a Conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A Liberal non-believer wants any mention of God and religion silenced.


If a Conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A Liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a Conservative reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh.
A Liberal will delete it because he's "offended".


Well, I forwarded it.



Here's a much more accurate version!


Which side of the fence?

If you ever wondered which side of the fence you sit on, this is a great test!

If a Liberal wants to keep guns out of the hands of criminals, terrorists and nutjobs, he works for reasonable laws that will require background checks.
If a Conservative wants to make sure he can buy a gun on a whim, he joins the NRA, which lobbies hard for no background checks. Who cares if terrorists & nuts can get guns easily, as long as Mr. Redneck can get his RIGHT AWAY??!!!

If a Liberal believes food should not be tainted with pesticides, and the runnoff from farms should not poison rivers, he works for reasonable laws to accomplish this.
If a Conservative wants to save a few pennies no matter what, he doesn't mind his environment getting poisoned.

If a Liberal is a homosexual, and wants the same rights as everyone else, he works for reasonable laws to insure that the Constitution's equal rights protections are reflected in the law.
If a Conservative is homosexual, he pretends he's not, works AGAINST legislation for equal rights to 'prove' how straight he is, then gets caught in bathroom stalls or other embarassing situations, revealing himself as a total hypocrite.

If a Liberal is down-and-out, he tries hard to find honest work and joins a unions that will help protect his rights from greedy corporations who want to pay everyone starvation wages, even as they continue to pull in record profits.
A Conservative drowns his sorrows in beer and wonders why life is so unfair.

If a Liberal doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels to listen to sane people who don't make things up and pass them as facts.
If a Conservative doesn't like a talk show host or news source, he complains about the 'liberal media' and the 'elites.'

If a Liberal is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A Conservative thinks that the separation of Church & State, a founding principle of this nation, should be done away with. Then, we can be just like those Arab nations that are run by religious leaders that Conservatives love so much!

If a Liberal doesn't like the fact that in the US, we pay twice as much for health care and yet are 24th in actual delivery of health care, that greedy insurance companies stand between doctors and patients in actual 'death panels' and deny care, so that they can boost their insane profits margins even more, he works for reasonable laws to change this sad reality.
A Conservative is oblivious to the fact that people are kicked out onto the street from hospitals when they are in dire need of care, that the main cause of people going bankrupt in the US is lack of health care, that insurance companies are happy to collect premiums from you for decades, but as soon as you really get sick, they find a technicality to boot you off, and never pay a red cent for your health care. That is, they are oblivious to this UNTIL IT HAPPENS TO THEM. Then, desperate and threatened with bankruptcy, they finally realize they were on the wrong side of the issue all their lives, and they suddenly become liberals!

If a Liberal reads this, he'll forward it, because it's funny and true, and the other version that Conservatives pass around is so full of BS.
A Conservative will delete it because he's "offended."

Well, I forwarded it.

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